5 things: (mini-challenge #3)

5 little things I loved about today:

*I got a new dryer. Hooray! I actually want to do my laundry.
*Watching Jack carry around the map at Shelburne Museum and try to figure out which way we needed to go.
*Ana had perfect manners tonight at dinner.
*Katie took a nice nap early on in the day which meant she went to bed very easily.
*Katie singing, "I touch a bouy. I touch a bouy" over and over again. (She likes to sing about random things. A few weeks ago while at the lake, Dave took her out to the bouy and let her touch it.)

(I am trying to find joy in little things. Today we had a really fun day that ended in fireworks, but I still tried to keep them focused on everyday happenings.  I'll update with some pictures at a future date.)

think outside: (mini-challenge #2)

Yesterday's challenge was to do something for someone outside of my home.

I often get so caught up in my list of to-dos around the house that I forget to actually think about people outside my little space. Yesterday I made a conscience decision to make some phone calls to some friends and catch up on some Relief Society assignments I needed to do. I really think that taking the opportunity to take a break from minutia and focus outwardly is a major principle in finding everyday happiness.

serve with a smile: (mini-challenge #1)

Thanks for your comments on my post yesterday. I know such amazing people.


I once head someone say, "Don't do something for someone that they can do for themselves."  It is all in the name of curbing entitlement and what not. There are times when I resent even small requests for help from my older kids or from Dave in the name of "They can do it themselves."  Today I decided to go the other direction. I woke up determined to serve with a smile.  To be willing to step away from what I was doing to help or to serve. Now that the day is over, I can see evidence that my willingness to serve helped the atmosphere in the home way more than it hindered it. As I sit typing this, I don't even feel like I was being imposed upon either. In fact, I feel happier for serving my family.

Now, the first rule of experimentation is to isolate the variable. Okay, I don't know if that is the first rule, but it is a rule. Today was a day of many variables, so it is difficult to analyze the result. Maybe I feel happier because I hit 23 out of 24 pitches at the batting cage tonight.  Or that I helped a friend paint her basement after the kids were in bed.

Whatever. I am happy tonight.

in my head

This is how I feel most days. I can't look at this pic without laughing. unknown source

This last week was rough. I can't really explain or pin point why. It was just a rough week. The kids seemed crazy and I felt like I was scrambling. (Part of it may have been that my dryer broke. I have amazing friends close by that have let me use their dryer and I was able to hang some stuff on the line, but still.) Today was mostly better... until bedtime. Putting the kids to bed is always a battle and most evenings by the time the kids are finally asleep I am so exhausted that all I want to do is sit. And sometimes cry.


Tonight Ana said to me, in a very calm voice, "Mom, I know you are just trying to teach me things, but the way you are doing it just isn't working for me. You need to change." I had no response. What can I even say to that? Maybe I would have laughed had it not been for the fact that I had been telling her to brush her teeth for 10 minutes and she was just standing around with her toothbrush.

I am discouraged. I am NOT where I want to be. I often feel like a fraud. I try to make it look like I have it all together but in reality I feel very much out of control. I get stuck in my head on a whirlwind of frustration. "The laundry is piling up. The kids are not listening to me. The house is a mess. I am snappy and defensive. The kids are not listening to me. I waste too much time. I should do things differently. These kids are not listening to me."  Once I am on it is hard to get out. It leaves a mark in it's wake.

I am sure many of us have felt the same. Often as women we put our best foot forward. That isn't necessarily a bad thing in general. We want to be positive. We know other people have it worse off than we do. Of course, then we think we are the only ones struggling behind the scenes.

I want to know I am not alone. I also want to know what has helped others overcome it. There is a great network of women that can offer support and encouragement and love if we are willing to open up with one another.

Tomorrow I begin a little mini-happiness challenge I am doing. My goal is to check in at the end of each day. 

Until then, drop me a line, even if it is anonymous, and tell me that I am not alone.

happy seventh birthday

Seven years ago I became a mother. I didn't know then how this little girl would challenge me, change me, and help me to grow. From the day she was born I knew she was strong. She squirmed her hands out of her swaddle while just a few hours old. She lifted her head to look up at Dave when she was just days old.  And while I walked her around our tiny living room I could feel the strength of her spirit. As she has grown I have seen that strength come out in so many ways.

Ana is not a follower or a leader. She is just herself. Of course there are times when she follows and times when she leads, but generally, she just does what she wants to do. She is passionate. She loves passionately, reacts passionately, gives passionately. She absorbs life like a sponge and exudes it in everything she does.  Last weekend we went camping and when we got to our campground she ran up to Dave and said, "Take a deep breath, Dad. It's fresh air!"

She loves horses and puppies and macaroni and cheese (from a box) and swimming and pink. She is sneaky and resourceful, and is hooked on Disney Channel. She will never pass up a chance to be one on one with her Dad. She is obsessed with getting new little purses and can't wait til she can wear high heels.

I love this little girl, and I am so glad she made me a mother.

lake placid

At the beginning of the summer we made a list of fun things to do this summer. Some of them are little things- like eat a popsicle or go on a bike ride - and some of them are bigger things. A couple weekends ago we crossed one of the bigger things off of our list: a visit to Lake Placid, NY.

We have wanted to go to Lake Placid ever since we moved here. After all, it was home to two Winter Olympic games, including the 1980 "Miracle on Ice", and it is located in the heart of the Adirondack mountains. As it is only a couple hours from here, we decided to make it a day trip.

Our first stop, after lunch of course, was a horse show. We didn't plan this activity, but when we saw it going on, Ana absolutely HAD to go. We watched a jumping competition for a while, then went on our way.

Next stop was the bobsled run. You can pay to go down it, but we were content to watch other people do it. The kids thought this was awesome. 

Next we drove into the town of Lake Placid, parked the car and walked around. Eventually we got into the ice skating rink. There were two rinks: the 1932 arena:

And the 1980 arena: 

While we were there I told the kids the story of the Miracle on Ice. They thought it was pretty cool.

We spent a lot of time just walking around town. It was a bit touristy, but was still fun. I thought this was funny: even though it was the middle of summer, there was snow on the ground in this one spot. I don't know why. 

It was interesting to me how tiny of a town Lake Placid is. It seems that the Olympics always are centered around big cities. I couldn't help but imagine the traffic traveling on those little country roads to get to the Olympics, and wonder where the spectators stayed during that month. I can't imagine such a small place could host the Olympics today. It was pretty amazing to go around a bend on this little highway and see the ski-jump lift rise above the hills high in the air. The Olympic games always fill me with such a thrill; it was fun to get a little taste of it in Lake Placid.

drive-in

A couple weekends ago we were thinking of taking the kids the movies. They had earned it (though I don't remember how) and we all wanted to go. So we decided to head to the Drive-In. The double feature of choice was Monsters University and Iron Man 3. (Both shows were awesome by the way. MU was just as good as the original, I think.) Which brings me to....

Top 8 (because I couldn't come up with 2 more) reasons why going to the Drive-In is my favorite way to watch a movie.

1.) We can take the kids to the theater and watch two new movies for only 20 bucks!

2.) Bring your own snacks. This time we brought homemade popcorn and oreos. Perfect!

3.)The old-timey playground. It had an actual teeter totter and a merry-go-round. What?!?

4.) It's late enough that by the time the kid movie is over, the kids are so tired they just curl up in the back seat and fall asleep, leaving us to watch our movie.

5.) I didn't have to worry so much about keeping Katie quiet. She watched most of the movie, but then got squirmy and tired somewhere in the middle.

6.) Adjustable volume. (I really don't like that the music is so much louder than the dialogue in most movies. I usually keep the volume down and turn on the captions.) (Does that make me sound old?) (I also like game shows.)

7.) Bedtime consists of carrying the kids into their beds. 5 minutes instead of an hour. Yes, please!

8.) It is socially acceptable to curl up in a blanket to watch the movie.  I haven't tried doing that at a regular theater, but I have a feeling it is more on the "unacceptable" side of the spectrum.



After this trip, I now have 3 things on my list of "Things I need in (or within 30 minutes of) the town we live when we grow up and get a real job": a temple, a Target, and a Drive-In theater.

independence

 "In this struggle for freedom, at home and abroad, our greatest weapon, both a sword and a shield will be our love of and faith in God. "

We headed downtown Thursday evening with a cooler of snacks, a blanket and lots of bug spray to  watch the fireworks over Lake Champlain.  It was hot and muggy and there were people everywhere. We found a spot right on the boardwalk and danced to the music as we waited for the sun to set.

Our friends brought glow-sticks for the kids, which they loved, (and which were literally a lifesaver since we lost Katie for about 30 seconds and Ana found her because of her glow-stick necklace). The adults sat talking and laughing and munching.

The fireworks began. Katie was nervous. She liked the lights, but they were too loud. She didn't cry, she just watched with her hands over her ears. She started on my lap, the moved to Daddy's, then finally ended up on our friend Sara's lap next to her best friend Kenzie. I couldn't take my eyes off of Katie's face. At times the fireworks were so bright that her whole face lit up like noon-day.  I hope a love of freedom is always shining out from that little face.

Friday morning we again packed our blanket and bug spray and sunscreen to head out to the parade.  As the parade began, two boy scouts at the front held signs to remind spectators to stand as the American flag progressed down the street. My heart swelled with pride. I was always a little bothered here at how few people stood up when the flag came passed, and it made my heart so happy to see so many people rise to the occasion. (Thank you, Boy Scouts!)

The parade was great. I loved the community bands riding on floats. Jack loved that Captain America was in it the parade and we all loved getting candy and popsicles and stickers. Katie waved to everyone through the whole thing. Several otter-pops later, the parade was over and we packed our things and scurried to our car.

Independence Day is a perfect holiday. It is a celebration without expectation. It is wonderful in its simplicity. Fireworks. A parade. A gathering of friends for hamburgers and homemade ice cream. Katie playing in the mud. (Though that is a daily occurance). The day ended with sparklers and baths.

I am proud to be an American. My heritage is rich with people of faith and perseverance and loyalty to their country. America is a beautiful land full of abundance. It is a land of so much promise. So many times in its history it has been a beacon of liberty and light. I choose to love it. I choose to believe in it. I choose to go forward with optimism. All over the world, there are good, wonderful people. I choose to believe in those people and the force for good they can be all over the world.

"I think it is time we should all awaken. Our concern isn’t about the flames of freedom which burn so brightly in our generation; the concern is that in the upcoming generation the fire has never been kindled. Our youth have never known anything but criticism of the United States of America. We need some faithful, free-loving patriots who will issue forth a clear, loud trumpet call. Remember Paul’s counsel: “For if the trumpet give an uncertain sound, who shall prepare … to the battle?” (1 Cor. 14:8.) Freedom ought to ring in the heart of every Latter-day Saint regardless of his country." 

(source for both quotes)

like mother, like daughter

"If she was taller, you could be twins!" The woman sitting behind the check-in table at Ana's summer camp was looking right at me and my oldest daughter. I was somewhat taken aback.

"You think so?"

"Oh yes! You even walk the same. Her eyes are a little darker, but other than that she looks exactly like you. You are both beautiful."

I thanked her and smiled, gave Ana a hug and walked back to my car.

I have heard it said before. Especially when people see this picture of me from when I was 5.

That's me on the left.

People say we look just alike. Here is Ana at 5.

Photo by Heather Dahle Photography

Truthfully, I don't see it.  At all. I can sometimes see a little bit of Jack or Katie in old photos of me, but I never see Ana.  Maybe it's the bangs?

Usually when I think about the way we are alike, I am frustrated. Mostly frustrated with myself.  I am emotional. She is emotional. I get irrational when I am tired. She gets irrational when she is tired. I am always ready to enter into a debate/argument/fight. So is she. She gets it from me.

The other night I sat on my bed thinking about her.  I was thinking, specifically, of what I love about her and I began to write them down. Her eyes. Her observational skills. Her uncanny ability to find her way around any obstacle. (Even if that obstacle is just Mom saying "no.")  She gets those things from Dave. As I sat over looking the list and smiling as I thought of my little girl, I noticed that most of the list were things that she got from Dave, or things that are uniquely Ana. At the top of the list, the thing that I wrote down first, was written:

Ana is generous. She is always willing to share what she has and to give to others.

She gets that from me.