use your words (and other stuff)

We often tell our kids "Use your words." Instead of whining, instead of hitting, instead of screaming. "Use words." I need to remind myself of that as well sometimes. Words save me. When I need to escape, I read. When I need to connect, I talk and listen. When I need to clear my head, I write. I write lists and I write in my journal and I write here.

The last few weeks have been a crazy emotional roller coaster and I read and I talked and I listened, but when I tried to write, I couldn't. The words wouldn't come. So I talked and listened and read some more. But I couldn't write.

This morning I woke up and decided that today I would write. I would force it to come. So, here I am writing. Let me write about the last 3 weeks.

1.) The kids and I got home from our fun trip. I was so glad to see so many great friends and it was good to be back in the groove. My wonderful friend (little Zach's mom) even had my house cleaned spotless for me when I returned which was such a blessing. I have great friends. Dave stayed behind in Utah for an extra two weeks while he finished his rotation, so I was on my own for a little while.

2.) A few days after returning home, some of our best friends moved. They were here when we got here and we (and our kids) grew to be such good friends. It was a sad day. I already miss them a ton.

3.) I managed to do 2 weeks in a row of sitting alone with my kids in church and didn't die. I even thought, "That wasn't too bad."

4.) We got water in our basement (see previous post). That was crazy for a minute. These pictures are from that day. The kids went out and played in the puddles before dinner.  The downpour happened after dinner. The last picture is right before I discovered water gushing into the basement.

5.) Our traditional Memorial Day BBQ was a hit. Somehow I returned home with more food than I took.

6.) Dave got home! And he had a few days off before returning to the hospital today, so that was awesome to have him home.

7.) Another family that we love moved. They were awesome and Vermont will not be the same without them.

8.) Saturday we went to a parade and a Super fun birthday party for our friend's daughter.  The kids came home with awesome Superman capes and they spent the rest of the evening running around in them. Katie wanted one too so we pulled out Dave's old one and she ran around saying "Superman!" On Sunday afternoon the kids put them on again with nothing else but their undies and ran around saying "I am Super Underpants Man!" Nothing like a cape to make a kid happy.

9.) Yesterday Dave was called to be a counselor to our Bishop. Crazy! It will make things a little bit more busy, especially on Sundays, but he is awesome and I know he'll be great.


So, there you have it. A glance at my roller coaster. I keep thinking things will settle down, but life doesn't really ever settle down does it?  I think as long as I keep using my words, I might be able to handle it.

potty talk and bloggy thought

We're potty training this week. I'm just hitting the frustrating stage. We'll see how it goes for a few more days.

Doing this for a second time made me think about Ana's potty training, which took me into the archives of my blog.

That got me thinking about my blog. I love being able to write down my thoughts. I was always a very diligent journal-er until Ana came along and this blog has saved me from forgetting all those memories. I love that I can look back and see what was going on. I'm really glad I've written this all down.

I have noticed that there is a change in the blogging world since I started over 3 years ago. It seems most blogs these days are super-specialized., whether its photography or cooking or crafting or whatever else. Sometimes I wonder if my blog is just wasted space. That I should just go back to writing in my journal for all these memories and thoughts.

Then I remember that I'm not really super-specialized as a person. I am interested in lots of things. I like sewing, music, being a mother, cooking, photography, reading and every other subject. Though I'm not super-talented at any of them, I like them all. So I know my blog is a little scattered. But that's me. I hope the few readers I have will stick it out with me. And comment every so often.

So thanks for stopping by.

blogging

For the most part, I love blogging. Its like my scrapbook and my journal and my way to keep in touch all rolled up in one.

But there are some weird things about blogger-space.

Like when I followed my "cousin's" blog for weeks before I realized it wasn't actually my cousin but a friend of a different cousin and that not only do I have no relation them, but I have never met them in person. That was weird.

And like the time I commented on someone else's blog about a comment they left on my blog only to realize I got two people confused. That's like junior high awkwardness via the internet. (I'm blushing just thinking about it.)

Also now matter how hard I try I can't help but check the blog of this girl I knew once. She didn't really like me, and it always bugged me that she didn't like me, but I just keep checking up for no good reason. Usually I go away feeling inadequate.

And then there are those blogs that I follow because they are so inspiring and insightful, and I feel like I know them so well, but they don't know me at all.

Anyway, its just weird sometimes.

Also, saying "blog" so much in a post is weird.

time well wasted

I've spent many hours loving this little corner of the world. Sitting at my computer, catching up with friends - old and new. Some may say we're wasting time. Perhaps they are right. But I think it is time well wasted. So many people I've connected and re-connected with in this world. So many times I've felt supported, comforted, and loved here. What better way to waste time?

Off and on over the last year, Dave and I have considered joining forces in the blog world. I finally decided that it wasn't just MY front porch, it was ours. We belong together. We got the name "Time Well Wasted" from one of my favorite songs from Brad Paisley. Dave drug his feet committing to a "country" name for our blog, but he agrees that it suits us well. We may be changing some things up for a little while. Comments and suggestions are welcome.

on weaning and pink lemonade (in that order)

I love this little boy. He is the light of my life. And he loves his mama! Today I feel like I'm breaking his heart.
I love nursing my babies. I really believe it is the best thing for them and for mom. I love that my body makes everything that they need for the first days on earth. I love the quiet time rocking my nursing baby, resting my head back on my chair and dozing off. Or watching him as he drifts from suckling to sleep and then back to suckling. It is wonderful and precious to me.

Jack really loves his nursing time. In fact, he wants to nurse a lot more than Ana did at this age, and probably more than most 9 month old babies. Many times he won't eat or sleep or stop crying until I nurse him. He doesn't take a bottle. But now he has thrush. Which means that we will keep basing the yeast back and forth between us and it won't go away until its treated. It also makes it quite painful to nurse him. I've been wondering what to do. Is it worth the treatment or should I just wean him cold turkey to a bottle? Then last night, in the midst of an already painful nursing session, he bit down with his little mouthful of teeth - hard. I screamed. I bled. I cried. I put him in his bed to fuss himself to sleep and said, "it is time to be done nursing." About 2:00 he woke up for his usual nurse-back-to-sleep session and I didn't do it. I walked the floors with him til he drifted back off. He woke up another time, but only fussed for a few minutes. I did not give in and nurse him.

He looks so sad this morning. Its like he knows he's losing something. I got him to drink a bottle of juice and eat some yogurt this morning. He won't drink formula but just looks at me with this sad face. Its breaking my heart. But I don't know what else to do.


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Yesterday was a wonderfully warm spring day. I went for a bike ride. I felt happy and great! So, I figured it was a good time to mention my award.

Last week, Shaela awarded me with me for a "happy blog" award. Yay!

When life gives you lemons... make PINK lemonade!

This award is given to those whose blogs are happy and positive and filled with hope -

Thanks Shaela. I will cherish it always.

Now I must spread the sunshine to other "happy blogs"

Haylee: I met Haylee when our husbands were "co-presidents" of a society up at BYU-Idaho. She is so sweet and her little boy is adorable. Her blog just sounds happy.

Kayla (sorry its private): I met Kayla in NY and she always had a smile on her face. Her blog does too.

Its so fun to be a part of all these great people's lives!