my oldest child

Having Ana home this week was so great! She adds so much life and energy (for better and worse) to the household. I feel like I don't say much about her around these parts since she is school so much, but this week I really noticed some things I absolutely adore about this little girl of mine.

I love that is really into writing. She writes on everything (for better and worse) and she is always asking how to spell things. She also loves to draw and color and paint and anything else that is artsy.



She is the life of the party! We had a slumber party on Friday night. We ate pizza, rolled out our sleeping bags on the living room floor and watched a movie together and then slept on the floor. Ana thought we needed one more touch: CONFETTI. She cut up paper and mixed it with some glitter and when we were all in our sleeping bags, she threw it up in the air.

Her smile is absolutely bright. Everything about her is 100%. When she is happy, she is filled with so much light and wonderful-ness. Her smile is contagious and beautiful.


She is full of surprises. Just when I think I am failing her and I'm not teaching her the right things, she comes in the room with the Book of Mormon in hand and says, "Will you read me a scripture story?"

How blessed I am to be the mother of such a strong, spirited little girl.

spring break

It's spring break for Ana this week.

I was hoping I'd get all my spring cleaning done. I was also hoping to go someplace different and fun. It looks like we're falling somewhere in between.

It has been rainy rainy rainy so we've mostly just stayed home and relaxed. Though I did get Ana's room shoveled out, which was on the top of my spring cleaning to-do list.

Jumping in puddles:

Jack fell face first into a puddle. That cued going inside.

Ana likes to push Katie around in the doll stroller. Katie doesn't seem to mind.

And wants her to play dress-up.

This is how I see Katie for most of the day: pulling on my legs.

breakthrough

For some reason when we moved here almost 2 years ago, Jack refused to swing. I'm not sure how this began. I have a picture of him swinging in Grandma's swing right before we moved, but since living here he has refused.  We've tried to get him to swing here and there, but it usually resulted in screams and running away.

 Slowly, over the last several months, he has been warmed up to the idea. Last fall he started swing - very slowly - on his tummy. This was all his idea, by the way. Everything has to be his idea if he is to cooperate. Since then I've asked several times if he wanted to swing on my lap or in the baby swing or if he just wanted to sit on the swing. The answer was always an emphatic "NO!" But the other day we were outside at the playground. Ana was swinging. Pumping high and loving it. Katie was swinging. And there was Jack, trying to SIT on the swing. I asked him very calmly if he wanted me to help him up. And he said, "yes." And then I asked if he wanted a little push. And he said "Yes."

 He was swinging! Ana and I praised him and clapped for him. Told him what a big boy he is. We took his picture. He said he wants it framed in his bedroom. Such a little thing, but it was wonderful to see him. He said to Daddy later, "I was really brave."

sometimes...

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with all the things that I need to CHANGE about myself.

Then I hear someone say, "life is long" and I realized that I have a long time to change. When I have been married 30 years or so, the few times in our early marriage when I lost my temper and started throwing laundry around my bedroom will make us laugh because that will not be who I am anymore. I am working on it, and I will know how to stay calm someday.



Sometimes I worry that I've already ruined my children forever.

Then I remember that most of what I have done with and said to my children will not be remembered, much like I don't remember anything from when I was 3 and 5. The phases that they are going through (that drive me crazy!) will pass. And as long as I give them mostly positive interactions, they won't remember the negative. And once again, life is long and I am working on it.



Sometimes I think that I have no right to be happy when people I love are experiences such hardships.

Then I get down on my knees and pray for them and Thank God for my blessings. He wants us to be happy. And the amazing thing is, those I love are doing the same thing. And sometimes life is hard, but it makes us appreciate how good it is, too. "Come what may, and love it."

normal days

Jack is my home-body.

In the mornings he gets up, gets himself dressed, and comes downstairs to smile and coo at Katie.

Then he wants to watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and spend the morning playing cars and playing "temple run" on my iPod (he's quite good actually), and making "valentines", which look like this:



And though he likes to play with his friends, when it is time to go, he is happy to go and usually is ready to leave before I am.

We stay home a lot. And though we are quite happy with this every day routine, it doesn't provide for many interesting blog posts.

Katie is in separation anxiety mode. I walk up the stairs or leave the room and she is in tears. Even if Daddy is around. And if I am around, she wants to be held. So I carry her around or stick her in the high chair with a graham cracker (where she can see me, of course!) and try to get something done.

Ana continues to love school, but doesn't like to be woken up in the morning. She is reading and it is a lot of fun to listen to her. I have her read to me every day and I am so proud at how good she has gotten. She also loves to write and do any sort of art project. She started soccer and loves it!

Dave is spending at least 60 hours in the hospital each week on his surgery rotation. He is learning a lot, is exhausted each night, and doesn't think he wants to be a surgeon.

I continue to be too far behind in my housework. But I am the proud owner of THIS stroller. (I found a super good deal on craigslist.) I am very excited to have it.

These normal days are good. So, so good. The weather is warming up. My tulips are getting ready to bloom. The sunshine has indeed been good for my soul. And though I still am a little frazzled by the end of the day, I know that there will be a day when I will look back and say, "those were the good days."

The days are long, but the years are short.



(click to enlarge - the last 3 Easters.)

bath time!

Katie loves bathtime!




She doesn't like to sleep through the night or leave Mommy's hip.

But she is quick to smile and brings us so much happiness.

happy easter

This is the first year I made Ana's Easter dress. I always wanted to, but somehow it never happened. Katie got a cute dress when she was born and it just happened to fit her now so I made Ana's dress to match. But then it was too short, and I ran to the fabric store on Thursday night to get a strip to lengthen it. I love how it turned out. I also made Jack's tie.

Trying to get 3 children to all look at the camera and smile their best at the same time is tricky. Especially when you are walking out the door for church.









Apart from cute children in new clothing and baskets full of candy, we watched THIS video as a family.

I hope you all had a wonderful Easter!

paradigm shift in parts

When my babies hit 6 months, things get complicated. The baby isn't sleeping as much during the day, mobility increases and so does the need to interact. And then I can't seem to get anything done. It doesn't help that it hits in the midst of my winter blues. I've been feeling overwhelmed the last little while.

*As women we have a tendency to compare our weaknesses with other women's strengths. Some women have immaculate homes. Some are very creative. Some are good at seeing others' needs and serving them. The fact is, everyone has something very important to them. For everything that one woman does, there is something she does not do.

I do things that others do not.

*A few weeks ago I asked my good friend and mother of 3 how she keeps it all together. She told me as much as she loves cooking, she only makes dinner a couple times a week. The other nights her family eats sandwiches, breakfast food, leftovers and other (healthy) quick fixes. The next day I asked my sister, "How often do you make a good dinner for your family?" "Probably 3 times a week," she answered.

I do not have to make dinner every night.

*I get down on myself sometimes. I get in a pattern of negative thinking - focusing on all the things I am not good at or things I don't do that I wish I did or things that I do that I wish I didn't. I decided to fight it while I mopped my kitchen floor.

I am good at things. I sing. I write. I am interested in a lot of different things. I really try to be a good, deliberate mother. I have talents.

*I have wonderful friends.

I am feeling better.

i don't get enough sleep at night

I have a list of things to write about.

Like how two weeks ago I got our van stuck in mud and had to get towed.

And how Jack's current obsessions include making valentines and cuting, coloring and taping pictures to the window.

Also how I have come to a breakthrough in the way I see things. I'd like to write about that too.

But Katie isn't sleeping well at night, and my sleep-deprived brain can't form two coherent sentences. I also have a hard time being pleasant.

So, I'll have to get back to you on those other things.