mother's week: day 2 - on being a wife

Six years ago (also on a Tuesday) Dave and I got married.



I had no idea then that over the next 6 years I would have 3 miscarriages and 2 1/2 children, or that I would have lived in Rupert for 2 years during which time we would both have appendectomies and we would live in a crummy little house that's circuit breaker went out if I vacuumed with the heaters on, or that I would move across the country for Dave to go to med school.

I did know that I would be happy with Dave, though. And though sometimes my less-than-desirable qualities come out, we still love each other very much.

I am always bothered with commercials and sitcoms that portray men/husbands as bumbling idiots that need rescued/redeemed by their wife. That isn't how relationships should work. It certainly isn't how ours works. Dave is kind. He is smart. He is logical. He is a fabulous parent. He is calm.

Men and women have different abilities and divine roles. Recently I heard said that the husband is the head of the home and the wife is the heart. I love that in so many ways. Biologically, the brain and the heart cannot work without the other. Metaphorically, the head is the symbol of logic and the heart is the symbol of emotions. How true that is in a marriage! I am a feeler. Dave is a thinker. I want affirmation; Dave wants to find solutions. I worry and wonder; Dave deals with situations as they come. I am emotional; Dave is logical. I think that this is part of the miracle of marriage. These differences, though sometimes they cause conflict, ultimately are what make a family wonderful.

We need each other. Men and women need each other. "Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord." (1 Cor. 11:11).


For fun, here is a sampling of pictures we've taken each year on May 3rd.

2006: I was 6 months pregnant.

2007: I went to Provo with my sisters on our anniversary, but I saw this cool double rainbow on the way. (I may have been pregnant with my 2nd miscarriage.)

2008: 8 months pregnant with Jack.

2009: We just bought this truck. We loved that truck...

2010: Ana got a new bike! (I was pregnant then, too. Miscarried a month later.)
No pictures yet this year, but I am pregnant again.

And now we're going out to eat and furniture/lamp store browsing for our date. Here's to many more years together.